[ stop reminding him that diggle, thea, laurel, and yes even felicity, are their own person. they make their own choices. it's so infuriating. why can't they just listen? ]
He must have gotten that from his mother. [ oliver's one of those things — funny, upon occasion. ] And spending time with you.
I know that it might not mean anything coming from me, considering I haven't lived any of what you're telling me yet, but I am sorry that I left you to deal with everything alone. [ whatever aspects have changed about him, he thinks he can safely assume that much is true — that he'd regret leaving his family. ]
[felicity loves william like he's her own. she's still not sure she wants kids of her own, but william? she adores him. would die for him and nearly did. ]
It was necessary but it hurt.
Before this, I hadn't seen you in seven months. William and I were in witness protection while you were in prison. It made things difficult when I realized you didn't have those same memories and I'm sorry I wasn't honest with you.
If the situation was reversed, I don't know if I ever would have told you the truth. [ that's oliver for: i get it. he understands how and why someone can keep something that pivotal — he's done it before, will probably do it again. he's lied to her and omitted the truth so many times that staying upset with felicity isn't fair. ] There's nothing easy about facing something you don't want to accept.
[ like having an entire life with someone that remembers absolutely none of it. ]
I'm not mad at you. I'm trying to wrap my head around all of it.
I know. You've kept so many secrets it's destroyed us too many times. I couldn't do that to you OR us.
[William was one of those secrets, but that's not something she's confessing to over text. It's his words: nothing easy about facing something you don't want to accept that hit her hard. he doesn't want to accept that they're married and she can't be angry at that. how can she?]
I'm not pushing for anything, Oliver. [It's not easy to say, but she does so for his sake.] But I WILL always be here for you.
[ hearing about his many faults leaves a sour taste in his mouth. the silver lining manages to be that whatever his failings are, she thinks sticking around for the long haul is worth it. the only choice. when he closes his eyes, he can't picture their wedding day, her dress, but she must have been beautiful. ]
I know. That goes both ways. [ he needs space but there's a huge difference between time away and not wanting to see someone again. ] I'm not going anywhere. I can't imagine my life without you in it, whether that's at home or here in this twisted city.
[ but he wonders how long it's going to be until the next time he lets her down. ]
[someday, should he ask, she'll tell him how that wedding day really went down. he might be surprised.]
Of course. You always know where to find me and you can always ask me for anything.
[it feels like she's back to being his right hand... something she's not going to dwell on. as long as he doesn't end up in sex prison and finds a contract, she's not going to worry about him too much. he's a survivor.]
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He must have gotten that from his mother. [ oliver's one of those things — funny, upon occasion. ] And spending time with you.
I know that it might not mean anything coming from me, considering I haven't lived any of what you're telling me yet, but I am sorry that I left you to deal with everything alone. [ whatever aspects have changed about him, he thinks he can safely assume that much is true — that he'd regret leaving his family. ]
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It was necessary but it hurt.
Before this, I hadn't seen you in seven months. William and I were in witness protection while you were in prison. It made things difficult when I realized you didn't have those same memories and I'm sorry I wasn't honest with you.
It's not easy. WE aren't easy.
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[ like having an entire life with someone that remembers absolutely none of it. ]
I'm not mad at you. I'm trying to wrap my head around all of it.
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[William was one of those secrets, but that's not something she's confessing to over text. It's his words: nothing easy about facing something you don't want to accept that hit her hard. he doesn't want to accept that they're married and she can't be angry at that. how can she?]
I'm not pushing for anything, Oliver. [It's not easy to say, but she does so for his sake.] But I WILL always be here for you.
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I know. That goes both ways. [ he needs space but there's a huge difference between time away and not wanting to see someone again. ] I'm not going anywhere. I can't imagine my life without you in it, whether that's at home or here in this twisted city.
[ but he wonders how long it's going to be until the next time he lets her down. ]
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Of course. You always know where to find me and you can always ask me for anything.
[it feels like she's back to being his right hand... something she's not going to dwell on. as long as he doesn't end up in sex prison and finds a contract, she's not going to worry about him too much. he's a survivor.]
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And you know how to reach me. If there's anything I can do for you, regardless of the consequences, you let me know.
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[She won't.]